Sometimes I write

I stumbled across a poem that I wrote a while ago and thought, "Hey, I have a blog. I should post it!" It is kind of melancholy but my thoughts don't tend toward rainbows and butterflies when I write.
So here it is, my poem, enjoy... (yet be appropriately melancholy)


She tries...

She sits and ponders who she is to be.
She has been told that she is too much...

“You’re too beautiful, cover up.
You’re too intelligent, dumb down.
You’re too outspoken, be quite.
You’re too complex, too mysterious.
You’re too emotional, too needy.
You require too much work to figure out.
You’re too much for me to handle.
You’re not worth the effort.”

She tries...
She hides her true feelings so as not to be “that needy, emotional girl”.
She hides her intelligence so as not to intimidate or emasculate those around her.
She tries to be sweet and soft spoken so that she appears appropriately feminine.
She tries to be that perfect woman. She wants to be worth the effort.
She tries...

She sits and ponders who she is to be.
She has been told that she is not enough...

“You’re not beautiful or sexy enough.
You’re not thin enough.
You’re not voluptuous enough.
You’re not feminine enough.
You’re not “Proverbs 31” enough.
You’re not enough to satisfy me.
You’re not worth the risk.”

She tries...
She spends hours on her hair and makeup trying to look like the cover of a magazine.
She spends hundreds of dollars on designer clothes in order to turn a head.
She starves or purges herself trying to attain that perfect figure.
She works herself until she is exhausted trying to keep up with Ms. Proverbs 31.
She tries to be that perfect woman. She wants to be worth the risk.
She tries...

Time and again her heart gets broken as she is continually told that
She is not worth the effort, she is not worth the risk.
This beautiful flower closes up and hides,
She withers and dies,
As she tries...